The Ottomen
The Grand Emporium
April 19, 1999

Review by Danielle Nelsen

If I had to sum their music up in one sentence, it would be "three piece, three chord rock with a sense of humor", but that's excluding the life-size cardboard cut-out of a banjo player which served as their frontman. With the bass player and guitar player both taking on lead roles on the mic, it was hard not to laugh hysterically at them going back and forth at each other. "Robin the Indian" (this reviewers favorite song) started off with the guitarist on lead vocals until unexpected "technical difficulties" cut out his sound and the cardboard banjo player hit the floor. But just when you thought it was all over, the bassist took over the mic and started shouting "R! O! B! IN! the Indian!" and the crowd started cheering.

This was pretty much the consistency of the entire set. Other songs included "Tennis Shoes of Love", "Billy the Robot" (or AKA "Bill the Robot"), "Dad Hates Dandelions" and "He-Man", each song sounding similar to the last and including lines like "I don't want She-ra, NO! I want He-man!" and "Dandelions will never die, leave them in the ground and they'll grow up to the sky." Song introductions often provided insight into the band's inspirations. An example: "The next song is called 'My First Sony'. It's about my first Sony." After that line, Emily nudged me and said "Profound thoughts! Write that down: 'profound thinkers'!"

Also noteworthy would be the very hysterical (and/or extremely intoxicated) dancing woman sporting tinted shades and a wallet chain. I believe it was she who prompted the band's request for "more bootie circling and stage humping". To my surprise, this request was granted by the surprisingly enthusiastic and supportive crowd of 20 or so. Hmmm.... even though their set sounded as if it could have been their 3rd practice, the Ottomen drew more people than the Black Water, who have been playing for about 7 (?) years. And people think I'm strange.

The last song of the set was an enthusiastic attempt to cover the Pixies (hey) that in no way could be compared to the original, but at least it wasn't "Highway to Hell" (which was performed by Alexi Lalas at the 1999 KLAMMIES).

Overall, the show reminded me of Adam Sandler's live performances with the quirky dance moves, simple chords, and ridiculous (yet hilarious) lyrics that have absolutely nothing to do with anything. The very similar and repetitive sound with each song got tiresome after a while, but their energy kept it going. The music in itself was pretty bad. And I don't mean bad as in no talent or potential, but it just seems to me that they could use a lot more practice. The performance was very entertaining and on more than one occasion I found myself laughing out loud, but overall they lacked the "togetherness" that keeps live performances tight and smooth sounding.

--Danielle Nelsen

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